


the world is your oyster

by twistedsky



Category: The Carrie Diaries
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-26
Updated: 2015-02-26
Packaged: 2018-03-10 11:05:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3287981
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twistedsky/pseuds/twistedsky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Donna strolls back into Mouse's life, and she's never the same again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	the world is your oyster

**Author's Note:**

> I've never really written fic in second person POV before, and so this was an interesting experiment.

You’re 21, and you’ve just graduated from Harvard.

The world is your oyster, they say.

Your GPA is nearly perfect, and your part-time job and half dozen extra-curriculars make this feel like high school all over again.

It’s not though.

You’re in med school, because your dream has changed. You took an undergrad course that made you volunteer at a local hospital, and you knew in one pure instant that _this_ was your future.

You spend the summer working.

You take a week to visit your family, and they’re proud, as they should be.

You want to visit your high school friends, but Maggie’s got a _family_ now, a husband and a two-year old. Carrie has New York and new friends, and Walt’s across the country, following his dreams.

You’re alone.

You have friends, of course, but more commonly you have rivals, or study groups.

You’re focused on the future.

You know exactly who you are, and what you want, and nothing will stop you.

~~

You like to study in the corner of an on-campus café.

One day, you hear a voice, and you look up sharply.

Of all people, it’s Donna LaDonna.

You want to call out to her, but your voice catches in your throat, and you remember that even though it’s the second week of classes, you have a major project due next week.

You look back down at your notes, and try to stay focused.

She’s Donna though, so she grabs her coffee and plops herself across from you.

You’re grateful, actually.

In a different world, your friendship would have become something much more than it was.

You look up at her now, and smile.

You’re hit suddenly by the realization that she’s even more beautiful than she was in high school, and there’s something about the way she talks—like she’s given into her inner nerd, and accepted that she’s smart and beautiful, and she doesn't have to hide from that anymore.

She tells you she got into Harvard law school, and you’re stunned. Not because she’s smart, because you knew that, but because this is something that she wants.

Donna has always gotten exactly what she wants though, and you know this.

You envy her talent for manipulating the world into being exactly what she wants it to be, whereas you fight with pure force of will and stubbornness to do the same.

She catches you up on her life(and you tell her about the last four years of _your_ life), and you ignore the books and notebooks in front of you, because they can wait a while.

Something inside your chest is warm and bright, and that hole you haven’t been able to fill for the last few years is suddenly so full it's spilling over.

~~

You’re studying completely different things, but for some reason you make time to study together—Donna with her law books, and you with your medical books.

You like to go to Donna’s apartment, because it’s spacious and quiet, unlike your own cramped, loud apartment. Your roommate is a perfectly nice girl, but she likes to sing to herself, and she bangs around her dishes loudly as she tries out new recipes for the restaurant she works for. She’s an aspiring chef, and not a student, but you usually don’t mind.

Donna doesn’t seem to mind that you come over for the peace and quiet.

You ask her once, and she shrugs and says she likes the company. She goes to parties sometimes, and that’s the time for the loud personalities and screeching voices.

She says you’re comforting, and you sort of feel the same.

It’s nice.

You don’t really have much time for anything but studying, but every once in a while, Donna grabs your arm and pulls you out somewhere.

You sing badly at a karaoke bar, visit restaurants you’d never go to by yourself, and every once in a while, Donna makes you go to fancy functions, because she’s trying to make contacts for her future. You wonder why she’s here, sometimes, but then you remember that she’s Donna, and she wants the very best for herself.

Her presence becomes a fixture in your life, and almost immediately, it changes everything.

You have no regrets.

~~

You go to a New Years celebration with her, and you drink more than you should, because Donna’s got your hand, and she’s introducing you to everyone she knows, and plenty she doesn’t.

The names and faces all blur together, but you catch every other word out of Donna’s mouth.

Donna tells you she’s going to find the hottest person at the party and kiss them at midnight, and so you shoo her away to do so.

You flirt awkwardly with a law student, and you think you might kiss him at midnight, but instead with a few minutes to spare, you wander off apologetically.

Someone grabs your arm and pulls you into a closet, kissing you just as the chanting outside the door hits one.

It’s Donna, and you can tell—soft lips, that fragrance you recognize as her favorite, and her drunken giggling between sloppy kisses.

You feel it anyway, in your _bones_.

You kiss back, and you wonder if you’ll regret this in the morning.

~~

You don’t, and she doesn’t either.

Nothing really changes, except you feel this intense awareness when you’re around her, and she keeps _smiling_ at you, like she knows something, like she _sees_ you.

Like she wants you, even.

You focus on school, on the fact that you don’t really have time to get involved.

You’ve never felt this way about a girl before—you’ve only felt this way about three other people to begin with, and never quite like _this_.

You want to call up Walt, and ask him if this is how it’s supposed to feel, but you haven’t talked to him in months, and you don’t want to be the kind of friend who only calls when she needs something.

The spring is mostly uneventful. It’s stressful, of course, but that’s to be expected.

Donna takes you out on Valentine’s Day, and wears the kind of dress that makes your breath catch in your throat and your face blush as red as it has ever been.

She kisses you when you get back to her apartment, and you let her, your hands rushing all over her body.

With this, everything changes.

~~

You read half a dozen books about lesbian sex, but you’re not even a lesbian, so the books are making some assumptions you’re not entirely comfortable with.

It’s the sex that matters anyway, you remind yourself.

Your preparation comes in handy, and Donna’s pleasantly surprised.

In the gentle afterglow, you wonder if it’ll always be like this, or if this is some sort of fluke.

Donna cuddles up against you, and you remember a night very different from this back in high school, when your friendship started, and you first ‘slept’ together.

You wonder if this was meant to be this way all along.

If you believed in destiny, which you don’t—you believe in hard work, and making things happen—you might think you’re destined to be together.

Instead, you snuggle against Donna, and the two of you fall asleep in each other’s arms.

~~

She asks you to spend the summer with her in Europe, and you want to say yes so badly, but your parents want you to take extra classes.

She kisses you though, and you forget about their objections, and suddenly find yourself saying yes.

You spend the summer months visiting the most romantic cities in the world, and it’s all a whirlwind of fun and fantasy.

The words _I love you_ threaten to spill from your lips on multiple occasions, but then she looks at you, and you get so lost in who she is that you can’t seem to say them.

Someone sees you kiss her in the airport once you get back to the US, and screeches obscenities at the both of you. Donna steps forward, threatening them with her perfectly civil smile and vicious words.

Your heart clenches in your chest, and you wonder if you can do this.

You wonder if you can live like this, if you can love Donna—but then she takes your hand, and you squeeze her hand gently, smiling at her, and you know it’s already too late to change that, because you already do.

Your heart beats like it wants to jump out of your chest, and that night the sex is different.

Sex is always different with Donna, because she’s adventurous, and that inspires you constantly.

Sex with Donna is never boring, and almost always fun, but tonight it’s almost painfully slow.

You tease each other, and your heart’s so full it could burst.

You whisper the words against her lips, and she freezes, stunned.

She tells you to say them again, and you do.

She says them back.

_I love you_ , you whisper again and again against her skin, getting lost in her.

~~

You’re a power couple, Donna tells you.

You’re graduating from med school next month, and you’re doing your internship and residency at one of the best hospitals in the country.

There’s some argument about whether or not you can live apart, about whether you _should_ , but then Donna laughs and tells you that she got a job with a law firm near where you’re supposed to be, and you realize that she’s not going to let you go by yourself.

“You don’t have to do this,” you say, and you can’t live with yourself if you make her miserable, or if she starts to resent or hate you, but she shakes her head.

“This is exactly what I want,” Donna says, and you realize that this is Donna, and she wouldn’t settle for anything less.

~~

You talk about babies, about the marriage that you can’t have.

Neither you or Donna wants to actually give birth to a child—you’re both so busy, and you have so much that you want to do with your lives.

Marriage would be nice, but it’s not an option.

You realize that you already have everything that you want.

There are no empty holes in your heart now, at least not ones that need to be filled with babies.

Your parents aren’t happy, but they haven’t been happy with you in years.

They love you, they say, but they also don’t invite you to Thanksgiving or Christmas dinners anymore.

Donna takes your hand and kisses your forehead, and promises that she’s your family, that you’ll always have her.

This, you know to be true.

~~

You pick up a magazine one day, and see that _Carrie Bradshaw_ has a book coming out soon. A _book_ , you think, and you’re so incredibly happy for her.

You want to call her and tell her congratulations.

Donna kisses your neck, and tells you that you should, but then you realize you wouldn’t even know her phone number.

That’s an excuse, you know.

Donna doesn’t let you get away with excuses, she pushes and prods until you admit that you’re scared.

She tilts her head toward your computer, and she’s right, you have to do this.

You should.

~~

Carrie invites you to her wedding, and you go for nostalgia’s sake.

You don't know what's going on, but the wedding doesn't happen(you hear later that Carrie eventually worked things out and got married, and you're happy for her).

You’re different people now.

Donna takes your hand, and you head back to your hotel room. As you leave the failed wedding, you realize something. 

You have a vague feeling you might never see Carrie again, but you remember your new friends, your career, and Donna, and you realize that’s okay.

Life moves on, people change.

Your present and future are in your hands right now.

The world is your oyster.


End file.
